The Chester Bennington Suicide

chesterbennington

See, I’m not the kind of person who keeps up with Social Media trends by posting “RIP whoever” whenever someone famous dies. But this time, I am affected. This blog is pretty personal but if you feel like you need to share this to save someone’s life, then go ahead. Please, go ahead.

I love Linkin Park. I can relate to their songs and I think they are one of the very few bands in the world that didn’t monetize on their popularity. They wrote music and performed – that’s mostly it. Sure, they’d do interviews and shit but their music is timeless and Hybrid Theory was one the first albums I bought with my own money back in 6th grade. For that, I know these people are good people. To be able to stick around without having to do any grandeur shit like performing at the Super Bowl or something like that just means that they are indeed in it for the music. (Money, yes. But music the most.)

REALLY BAD ENERGY

According to documentaries, old and new, Chester was abused and molested as a child. I’m pretty sure he has heard countless times to just get over it. That “this” is the thing of the past. That moving on is easier than it seems and that you shouldn’t carry this baggage with you as you grow old. Well news flash, people. Forgiveness is something but carrying memories of abuse and pain with you especially from people who you’d expect to give your proper upbringing is difficult.

You can’t just tell people to shut their feelings off. You can’t tell people that you understand when you haven’t walked the exact same path as they did. Don’t tell people to stop the drama when they don’t even talk to you. Don’t tell them to shut the bad energy off when bad energy is all they have. DON’T MAKE THEM FEEL LIKE THE BAD ENERGY THAT THEY HAVE MAKES THE WORLD WORSE WHEN IT’S ALL THAT’S LEFT OF THEIR EXISTENCE.

PEOPLE ARE COLD FOR A REASON.

TRYING TO KEEP IT TOGETHER

Being a musician was his job, and part of that job description was to ensure that his spirit doesn’t break no matter what happens because a lot of people rely on his mentorship and his music.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep it together? Sometimes when you’re really, really broken, you won’t have any choice but to run to a bathroom and cry and just let a little bit out so you can go back out there and show the world you’re okay. It’s so hard.

And the world makes it harder and more painful because they think that the pain isn’t real. How can it be so painful when you’ve so much success and money? Money isn’t everything. Success is subjective.

LOOKING FOR AN OUTLET AND WANTING TO DISAPPEAR

The arts can only do so much. It can only help depressed people cope. It can only keep those in pain preoccupied until the process is over and they’re back in bed with the same pain they started with. Nothing can take away the pain.

Sometimes, the depressed like to be with people. They make other people laugh. Sometimes it looks like they want to be the center of attention when all they really want is to entertain so it can be about others and not about them. In reality, the depressed hate the attention.

Many times, the depressed just wants to disappear. Goodbye, world!

SOME THINGS WILL HAUNT YOU FOREVER AND THAT’S JUST THE WAY IT IS

If you’re in pain, be with someone who understands. Be with people who won’t judge you for wanting to lie down in bed the whole day. Be with people who will actually acknowledge that you are in real pain because the truth is; knowing that someone understands that the pain is real is enough. DON’T GO LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO SAVE YOU. ONLY YOU CAN SAVE YOURSELF.

Stay away from those who don’t understand that breaking down is a routine. Those that judge you for being sad because of something that happened decades ago have no idea that whatever transpired in the past moulded you to the person you are today. If it hurts, it hurts. You don’t need to explain yourself.

Rest in Peace, Chester. I know many of us have wondered how it would feel like to be on the other side just to rid of the pain on this earth. I hope you got what you wanted. I hope you really do. Your music will live on.